apostlemage:

pyramidslayer:

look what you can buy

There is a Pope in the Cars universe. This means that there is Catholic Christianity, which means there was a Jesus car who was crucified. Jesus Chrysler was crucified by car Romans under Pontiac Pilot who washed his wheels. A car was nailed to a cross and ascended to Heaven.

apostlemage:

pyramidslayer:

look what you can buy

There is a Pope in the Cars universe. This means that there is Catholic Christianity, which means there was a Jesus car who was crucified. Jesus Chrysler was crucified by car Romans under Pontiac Pilot who washed his wheels. A car was nailed to a cross and ascended to Heaven.







fragilekids:

tbh the only reason i know how to read a clock is so i can figure out when we get out of class



dajo42:

dajo42:

harry potter: “albus severus, blah blah blah slytherin tootle toot fart noise you were named after the bravest man i’ve ever known”

teddy lupin: “hey uh… remember my fucking dad”

[albus arrives at hogwarts]

albus: “hello professor! did you know severus snape? my dad says he was the bravest man he ever knew”

neville longbottom: “is that fucking right”





biological-warfare:

giveme-brandy-onmybreath:

mitsurugi:

gordonjramsay:

skypestripper:

aclorable:

aclorable:

aclorable:

which country has the most birds

portugeese

wait

thats a language

portugull

nice recovery

don’t you mean nice redovery

turkey, how did we miss turkey









pottersir:

i don’t mean to brag or anything, but the 7th harry potter book was dedicated to me



carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

thegreensanitarium:

riverdogproductions:

newworldorganization:

drifterscave:

doitsundere:

anal0g2:

asvpyeezy:

kanye sleeping.

shhhh

Kanye Rest

in his Kanye Nest

when he wakes up he’s going to be his kanye best

This is the tale of Kanye West, who is snuggled in his Kanye Nest, having himself a Kanye Rest, for he must be at his Kanye Best, before he’s off on a Kanye Quest, where he’ll be put to the Kanye Test, in hopes to retrieve the Kanye Chest that is distinctly marked with the Kanye Crest, He shall return to the Kanye Nest and have himself a Kanye Fest, where he will welcome many Kanye Guests, but first he must be rid of Kanye Pests, before he can put on his Kanye Vest and dance at the party with such Kanye Zest.

did you just

this sounds like the intro theme song to a children’s show about kanye west going on adventures and respecting the sanctity of nap time

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

thegreensanitarium:

riverdogproductions:

newworldorganization:

drifterscave:

doitsundere:

anal0g2:

asvpyeezy:

kanye sleeping.

shhhh

Kanye Rest

in his Kanye Nest

when he wakes up he’s going to be his kanye best

This is the tale of Kanye West, who is snuggled in his Kanye Nest, having himself a Kanye Rest, for he must be at his Kanye Best, before he’s off on a Kanye Quest, where he’ll be put to the Kanye Test, in hopes to retrieve the Kanye Chest that is distinctly marked with the Kanye Crest, He shall return to the Kanye Nest and have himself a Kanye Fest, where he will welcome many Kanye Guests, but first he must be rid of Kanye Pests, before he can put on his Kanye Vest and dance at the party with such Kanye Zest.

did you just

this sounds like the intro theme song to a children’s show about kanye west going on adventures and respecting the sanctity of nap time





I guess
I disagree with you but ill let you have this one because I don’t feel like debating anymore with your simple ass (via monitormylife)


ostracizedpoodle:

i was in the car with my dad and a little kid ran into the road and my dad yelled “natural selection” 



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