I told you. All the men in my life die.
I’m not a man in your life, okay? You said so yourself. I’m a little shitpot.



daydreamradio:

My family is no longer allowed to play Wii bowling.

daydreamradio:

My family is no longer allowed to play Wii bowling.





bemusedlybespectacled:

do you ever think about the judges for the triwizard tournament trying to figure out who to kidnap for the second task

like they’re all just sitting in dumbledore’s office and karkaroff goes “well word on the street says that krum has a crush on that granger girl”

"damn," says dumbledore, "I wanted harry to rescue her. well, what about the delightful miss chang?"

"no," says bagman, "we’ve got her down for diggory"

"stop sinking my ships," says dumbledore



edgarsbitch:

alecstasy:

alecstasy:

my dog just had surgery to get a nipple removed and when she came home after the surgery she immediately walked to the window and she has been staring out of the window for like half an hour now thinking about her new life with one less nipple

image

when will my nipple come back from the war



illaminati:

"maybe you shouldnt eat all of tha-"

image





multipack:

if my life was a drink it would be room temperature coke with the ice melted





googlearths:

GOING TO CLICK ON A NEW TAB AND ACCIDENTALLY EXITING OUT OF THE ENTIRE WINDOW

image



pussyhands:

what if our use of emojis gradually becomes so extensive that we actually circle back to writing in hieroglyphics





alwaysactually:

lusilly:

some muggleborn like “i want to be an astronaut when i grow up!”

wizard kids like “wtf is an astronaut”

"oh you know…the people who go to the moon"



T H E M E